Trust Your Gut (But Train It First): Developing Maternal Instinct Through Information
Aug 21, 2025
Introduction
We’ve all heard it: “Just trust your instincts.”
But if you’re a new mom - sleep-deprived, emotionally stretched, and flooded with advice from every direction - this can feel less like encouragement and more like pressure wrapped in a cliché.
Just like any strength, your parenting instincts are something you build. With practice, clear information, and real-life experience, that inner sense is likely to become one of your greatest tools.
In this post, I share the patterns I’ve seen repeatedly over the years as a pediatrician - common circumstances and challenges that many new moms face. Based on these observations, I offer insights into how you can strengthen your parenting instincts through trusted knowledge, and what building real confidence as a new parent often looks like.
Why "Just Trust Your Instincts" May Not Be Enough
I’m a big believer in tuning into instinct and intuition - it’s guided me in powerful ways over the years, leading to outcomes that I’m truly grateful for.
But when it comes to early motherhood, that advice alone - “just trust your gut” - can feel overwhelming. It can leave you feeling like you’re supposed to just know what to do, even if you’ve never done it before.
In reality, it’s not always that simple. Especially when you’re overtired, unsure, or emotionally stretched, what may feel like instinct in the moment could actually be a reaction - driven by stress, fear, or sheer exhaustion. And while our emotions are important to pay attention to, they can sometimes cloud the clarity we’re hoping for, particularly in unfamiliar situations.
How Knowledge Builds Intuition Over Time
I’ve found this reframe to be especially relatable for new moms: true maternal intuition isn’t just a fleeting or emotionally-charged gut feeling - it’s an instinct shaped by knowledge, experience, and deeper understanding.
For example:
Once you learn what’s typical for newborn sleep, digestion, or crying patterns, you become better equipped to notice when something is off. You may not be able to put it into words right away, but that internal nudge is coming from a place of familiarity, context, and connection.
That’s where your pediatrician can be a helpful partner - offering the foundational knowledge that allows your instinct to take root.
The Difference Between Instinct and Anxiety
One of the most important distinctions you can make as a parent is the difference between a grounded gut-check and an anxiety-driven reaction. Here's what I've found helpful:
- Instinct tends to feel calm and consistent, even when it’s alert. It’s that quiet sense that something either is or isn’t right, and can often be supported by repeated patterns or observations.
- Anxiety, on the other hand, tends to feel frantic. It can rush in when you’re tired, uncertain, or drowning in conflicting information.
The more you understand your baby’s body, routines, and typical behaviors, the easier it becomes to separate fear from fact, and to trust your internal compass.
Practical Ways to Develop Your Maternal Radar
Think of maternal instinct like a muscle - it gets stronger with use and support. Here are a few ways to build it:
✔️ Learn the basics of newborn physiology - what’s expected vs. what’s concerning
✔️ Keep track of your baby’s patterns and changes
✔️ Don’t dismiss small observations - bring them to your pediatrician
✔️ Ask why certain things are happening, not just what to do about them
✔️ Pause before reacting - give yourself space to check in with what you know
How to Balance Trusting Your Instincts with Seeking Support
Trusting your instincts doesn’t mean you have to go it alone. In fact, a strong maternal instinct often includes knowing when to reach out for guidance.
If something feels off - whether it’s a persistent skin flare, a crying pattern that seems intense, or congestion that feels beyond the norm - your pediatrician is there to help you sort through it.
Your observations matter. And they’re not “just” feelings. They’re part of how we, as providers, piece together your baby’s health picture and best plan of action.
The Ready Set Mom Approach to Building Confidence
I built Ready Set Mom on these very ideas:
That instinct and information are partners, not opposites.
That you can trust your gut - and also take time to train it.
This course offers clear, pediatrician-backed guidance to help you understand your baby’s body, behavior, and needs, so that over time, your decisions feel less reactive and more rooted in both connection and clarity.
Because confidence doesn’t necessarily come from knowing everything. It comes from knowing enough - enough to listen closely, act calmly, and reach out when needed.
Want to strengthen your parenting instincts and feel more grounded in your decisions?
Explore the Ready Set Mom course to get the newborn care clarity you’ve been looking for. You have the intuitive sense and your connection to your baby. Now let's help you train it 🤍
